| Chapitre | yea/nay |
| 1. Power In The Valley pp. 1-3 | YEA |
| 2. The Most Threats Ever There Were pp. 3-6 | nay |
| 3. Demolishin pp. 6-7 | nay |
| 4. Ruminasiens Of The Fading pp. 8-9 | nay |
| 5. Invigoratien pp. 9-11 | nay |
| Indectic p. 12 | nay |
But there came a morning down in the valley of Catastros when Kyte the Oltralite, King of the Streets of that restless warless clime of Oltral, sprang up from his sleepslab in the dewy field, wakend by a sinister pregnancy of the dawn, some new pressure upon the prickly air. And behold, there compassing about his own petite brigade’s modest encampment of sticks and blankets did encroach a very mighty host, indeed, a great clanging tide of titanium and temperd steels, all aroundabouts him and his youthful crewe. And straightway fear washt over him, casting his flesh into compensatory flexations which the histrionic metaphysicians have calld autonomus relaxicos necessitatum. For these out here surrounding were those who proceeded outen the city of Stalacton; and great was their power, neither shew they mercy under most condisien.
Whilst yet Kyte pondered these things, there came a voice saying, Lo, Kyte the Streeter is risen, up early for to fall. And Kyte’s gaze went a-cruising forth; and there in colossal trees raisd up in the night sat men, which men were Stalactites, the same which were the voice that said, Kyte the Streeter is risen. And his fear neohyped beyond the present plane, and his sandals filld with efflux; for men in trees add an unmatchable dimensien.
Now, the King of the Stalactites was an giant, having thirty measures o height, and six spans o breadth. And the Stalactites calld him Fool, for those steely beings were no respecters of persons. Yet and yea was he their King, was Fool.
2
The Measure of A King
This man-king, this grand ole trouncer of townes, destiny broker, ripsawyer of natians, trick figure of fragile alliance: Whence came all that size about him? Well. These thirty measures and six spans that his frame traverst, these were Kingsmeasures and Kingspans, inventions which Fool of Stalacton hath meted unto his own measuring, and certainly none other may to use them under law. For by common measures, Fool standeth neath the norm. But by Kingsmeasure standeth he thirty measures, and proclaimeth him self Giant. And in every year, word doth go all upon the land, such as, Say, friend, hast thou sent forth thy sending of supplicasiens unto Terrible Giant King Fool? Reach deep, friend; for a big king, needeth big money.
Now. There was a certain Stalactite soldier who saith through cheesepackt cheeks unto his kindred over supper: Verily, His Majesty be the squattest giant e’er these hostile eyes have registerd.
But seldom ran such counterlip as that. For so thorough hath Fool’s Kingsmeasure campain triumpht—inculcated in the public lore through catchy bardsong and subliminol graffito laid upon the temple walls—that peopel who have heard of him see in their eyes a master giant, upon at last beholding him in the flesh. And so ultramax hath it triumpht also, that e’en those who have heard of him not—whole strangers—do say upon catching sighten him, Lo, go a giant! Hap the sureness of his concrete & rebar bearing, his megaton giantly pressing of the four dimensiens, whelm their reckoning. For he were certain born to giantness, if born short.
Now, the saying of the soldier unto his kindred, concerning the squattest giant, was monitord by a kingservant which dress-ed as a lamb and graze-ed by the soldier’s window, aspiring to a crest in the world of surveillance for his liege. And he hied him straightway unto Fool and bleated out his report, saying, This one hath dubbd thee with a dubbing, no less a dubbing than this: Squattest Giant. Zaw, lord! Mine heart wrencht at me as with an wrench, to blow through that window and rend him there at the family table, for the slaughter he hath done the image of my King; but wherefore squander all the carnage for myself, and cheat Terror’s annals of a dazzling cascade of thine own storied retributive artistry? So I stitcht up my spleen and says, says: Let the Giant have him.
And Fool reeld about in primordial agony, crying, Some giants be neither so apparent as some other giants; knoweth he not that merely I be one of the neither so apparent? O, thought I that we had won; thought I that we had beaten persepsien itself. Ach: I would that this soldier were never born! For now, thinking of it, I cannot bear the notion: he standing in his rank as I pass, and seeing me, who am an giant, and he thinking that I be squat, there in his private humerus mind. Yea, I would merder this soldjer yesterday, to prevent even a single daysworth of this form of thinking. May I to step back through some temporal vortex, and stop his mother? Well; I in my vehemence have present means, without vortices. Sheepster thou, see and smell these present means!
And Fool the King opened the Resolutien Room, Room of Denouement, where from the heaven dangld five thousands of polychromaticol mood ropes, ornate of braid & tassle-lavish, each redolent of lavender, or jasmine, or clove, or spikenard, or citronella, or honysoukel, or sassafras, or frankincense, or myrrh, or angelfoot, or salt and vinegar, or goatcheese, or anchovie, or tobacco.
3
And he snifft out that one he sought, and tugg-ed thereupon. And away in the city opened there a cavern neath the soldier’s house and swallerd it up, and also the soldjer, and also the kindred, and also some other families.
And Fool saith unto the servant which hath so sheepishly spied for him, Say, friend; stand thou not there upon that timid safe tile whereupon thou standest; but in stead, come thou hither, trusting consummately in me, and stand upon this certain other spot that I adore, and let close thine observance-wearried eyes, that thou mayst receive the full measure of things to be.
And the servant thoght, Yea, now unto me cometh his graditudes, in the form of a governor’s wand—and a fat ripe daughter or two, upon the whom my stealthy perfessionel eye oft hath feasted. And he gatherd within him the pomp of his station, and attaind unto the ador-ed spot.
But Fool hath no such remunerative notiens; but in stead yankt he upon a dondle, and there thunderd down a pulping pillar and compresst the servant to a wafer, to a wafer compress-ed it him. For this one whilst grazing hath heard the abominatien utterd by the soldier, hath drawn it along upon cogitation’s rollers through the cognitive and recognitive factories of his mind, absorbing unto his own machinery its corrosive taints both volatile and insidius; and he hath further witnesst such reeling and raving by the pester’d potentate as might, were Fool no Giant, be linkt to lunacy. Mmm. Poor Fool shaken his head with the dismals: there goeth another good servant unto the wafer bin, who hath been contaminaged by unseemly things seen and heard, and inoculated with the contagion of criticol thinking. These days, Fool seemeth to spend a passel of his time a-purging the service rolls and burying records, lest his fortunes siphon all out in demiser benefits to the kin of the calamitously discharg-ed. And the King looken with misery upon the dondle, and saith, This hdahndohl, ’tis no easy answer; shall not I come to rue its installatien? For I can not resist its allure, with subjects in the room. And he given it a recreasienal yank, to watch the actien of the pillar, and derive his modicum of sadisfaxien.
Such King were Fool; such his measure, such his justice, such his worldly dismals. Yet, ’twere wrong to size him up in the half-light of his indoor regime alone. For Stalacton also hath an outdoor aspect, and her King hath an hell of an army.
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